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We are literally only weeks away now from a four yearly event, being held in London, where competitors at the peak of their powers are gonna tough it out on our screens for the right to be the winner.

Oh yes, It’s the London Mayoral Elections. Now before all of you not living within the M25 flick to the next page, remember this… whatever bonkers idea the London Mayor comes up with, if it works (i.e. makes money and no one whinges that much), it will be in your town next year. If your hood is Tonbridge, Bristol or Birmingham… there could be a bendy bus, congestion charge or a rubbish Barclays bike near you soon. So this matters.

But which of the Big Three truly represents the Scuba divers’ best interests?

Here's our guide:

Paddick – Never been diving. Ex- plod. Gay Liberal.

Livingstone – Never been diving. Whiny voice. Newt lover. Built Thames Barrier but gave us overly long buses.

Johnson – Never been diving. Etonian. Scouse-bashing. Ancient Greek speaker.

A tough choice. But Tanked Up backs Boris for one reason. He is the human equivalent of the Beluga Whale. And we all loved those on Attenborough didn’t we?

Enuff politicking. What do we have in store for you this issue? Diving in Papua New Guinea, a rough guide to Dover, Dr Oli snaps on his rubber gloves and Rob is off medication and taking an odd look at the dive world.

Enjoy, Ed

PS. Still p****d off there’s no darts at the Olympics. Where are all those young St Paul’s protestors when you need them for something really important?

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